I’ll let you in on a little secret…
Your body language can change your life.
Body Language can change how successful you are in school and at work. It can change the way you think about yourself. You can even use Body Language to attract women. Research has shown that adopting certain postures can improve your mood and some people even argue it can increase your testosterone levels.
According to studies, 55% of human communication is body language, 38% is tone of voice, and only 7% is the actual words spoken. Body language makes up the majority of normal communication.
Most men don’t consciously think about their body language, but for me it was always something I was interested in. For the past few years, I was intrigued by body language and endlessly researched the topic. Perhaps the best book I’ve read on Body Language was written by a former FBI agent, Joe Navarro. Its called What Every BODY is Saying: An Ex-FBI Agent’s Guide to Speed-Reading People. It’s truly brilliant and goes really in depth. I got the audiobook instead of the novel, listening to it while I did my morning cardio.
Believe it or not, reading that book changed the way I live my life.
Why is Body Language So Important?
Why was it that some people got more respect than others?
Why did that guy seem more confident than me?
Why did women suddenly start paying attention to me when I walked confidently?
Body language is absolutely crucial for changing how others think of you and behave around you.
If you stand like a scared little guy with a rounded back, don’t expect to be treated with respect.
If you walk around like you own the place, expect more glances and respect from people.
How Do You Stand Like A Man?
One big difference between men and women is Dominance. Men generally are bigger, stronger and more aggressive than women, thanks to testosterone. A confident man would display his dominance and confidence. You can use your body language to communicate to others that you are indeed a confident individual.
As simple and common as it sounds, standing up straight is the first thing you need to do.
Standing up straight is the combination of: your head and eyes looking straight ahead, chest pushed slightly out, relaxed shoulders and a flat back. You should look confident and relaxed. It might feel unnatural at first but every time you find yourself slipping, correct it.
Don’t look at the ground. Keep your head up.
Make eye contact with people. Avoiding eye contact in some cases, can be signal of weakness, especially when it comes to women. If you can’t look a woman in the eye, you are communicating that she is too intimidating to look at.
The 2nd part of standing like a man is taking up space. High status and high value men take up space.
Do you think a boss or CEO cares about getting in people’s way?
If you take up a lot of space, it communicates that you are confident person who isn’t worried about getting in other’s way. A dominant man wouldn’t care at all if he was taking up too much space.
If you are standing, your feet should be set wider apart than normal.
Take a look at this military pose. It clearly communicates confidence, assertiveness and a don’t fuck with me kind of attitude.
The 3rd major part to standing like a man is based on your hands and arms. Putting your hands in your pockets is closed off body language that often times can signal to others that you are not confident and/or not receptive to what is going on.
Keep your hands out of your pockets. Keep your hands and arms relaxed by your side.
Do not fidget with your hands or arms. Many people have nervous ticks when they might rub their face or adjust their clothes. The most confident individuals often have the least amount of movement. You won’t see them rubbing the back of their head nervously.
How To Walk Like a Man
Dominant, confident and relaxed men typically walk slower and with a purpose.
They are in no rush and don’t speed walk past people. They aren’t worried about getting in people’s way. Quite honestly, they feel they are naturally superior to others and don’t worry about them.
They don’t take small steps. However, taking giant steps would make you look weird and clumsy, so don’t overthink this one too much.
Here is a good example:
After I made these simple changes in my body language, my life changed.
When I walk by women they give me looks a lot more frequently. Women like confidence and that is the first thing they notice if you get this down. They won’t be interested in a guy with his head down who’s scared to even make eye contact.
I’ve also noticed that men have given me more respect, they don’t make fun of me, or mess with me like they did in the past. Men who aren’t confident in themselves will not mess with a guy displaying dominant or confident body language.
My mood has also changed. I feel better about myself and behave like a confident man should. I take more chances and care less about the opinions of others.
Research has shown that faking happiness or even confidence, in fact, makes you more confident and happy. I won’t delve deep into the psychology behind it, but it works.
You’ll rarely see someone like a professional athlete with poor posture and unconfident body language. But you do see depressed people with very unconfident and closed off body language.
Your body language should show that you have the confidence to stand up for yourself. When you get this down, you are signaling to women that you are someone they want. You are signaling to men that you’re someone who isn’t afraid of confrontation.
It takes some practice, I’ll admit that I still catch myself standing poorly sometimes.
After a while, it will become natural to you.
If you’re interested in reading more about body language: